I hate everything and everyone else in the world is happy whilst I have turned into the demon mumma from hell.
Woke up in a foul mood after hardly any sleep headaches and nightmares which could beat a steven king best seller. Anyone young or old within a 5 mile radius has had their heads ripped off their shoulders.
I've had the kids begging me to start smoking again as they can't take any more of the moaning grumpy despressed mumma I have turned into. I just want to curl up into a ball and cry all the time every waking moment is a living hell.
Everywhere I turn smells of poop and tastes like poop washed in ashtray water.
Had a bonfire party tonight and it seemed like everyone was laughing and joking with a ciggy in their hand yet i was sad crabby and fagless.
On a good note tho I didn't succumb even tho that evil voice kept saying go on just one and all this pain and suffering will be over you will be happy and laughing again.
please please let this get easier soon i'm not sure if my willpower can hold out if it doesn't.
day 5 everything smells and tastes like poop ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww my tongue feels like a carpet and it feels like an ashtray has been poured into my mouth so on the school run I was chatting through my hand to the other mums.
has that smell always been there and I never noticed.. god I hope not but going for a long sheep dip just incase hehe.
hope I can manage the day.. next test the 1st weekend not easy with my 2 but heres hoping on monday that i'm whooping and happy to have made it through.
I've just found this site horray support at last ;0)). I am on start of day 4 using patches and inhalor.
The last 3 days have been really hard i think of cigs nearly all of the day but know I have to give up my 40 a day habit as I have copd and don't want to end up going the same way as my mum did or putting my kids through the same thing i witnessed.
The daily ailments I can cope with (this morn I woke up with man voice hehe) but the anger rages are awful i had a huge hissy fit this morn as I couldn't find the kids shoes (nothing new there I can never find them most morns) but today i flipped like taz soo not a good look.
Hopefully coming on here will ease the frustrations ;0) look forward to helping others and being helped on here .